i will write a book about the secret garden
inside us

bruce springsteen says it is a place that
you can't remember
but you can't forget

i was invited to a secret garden once
by members of an american indian tribe
it is called a stomp ground
and it is the place where the people dance and sing
as they have for centuries
many of the songs originated so long ago
that the meaning of the words is no longer known
but the spirit of the dance has not changed

There are over a dozen stomp grounds in the state of Oklahoma
and they are always well hidden
in wooded areas
My friends and I were told how to find the grounds
but maps are never drawn up
many years ago, native people found that their ways were not respected
and that trouble would come their way
if outsiders could find the stomp grounds
so it is tradition not to put the location or time of the stomp dances into print
and that is why we got lost and took an extra hour finding the place
but the dance goes on all night
so nobody really cares when you get there

there are people of all ages there
and the participants circle around a sizeable bonfire
the native women circle the fire with turtle shells on their legs
that are filled with pebbles
so as to provide a percussion backdrop to the songs
these women are called the shell shakers
the chants are mostly done by the men

wilma mankiller says in her book that at best
the native americans were treated like children
with condescension
and at worst they were denied the freedom
that is the basis of America
the freedom to be who you want to be
and to determine your own identity and future

while oppression from whites is mostly a thing of the past
i understand from friends that there remains tension within the tribes
between the "traditionals" who are regulars at the stomp ground
and the tribal members who attend the baptist churches
i understand that the "christians" are rather judgmental and superior
toward the traditionals
which is an attitude that i have never understood
since nothing irritated Jesus himself more than those pious pharisees
all of this contributes to the sense of cherished secrecy of these ceremonies
more under the video




just as the stomp dances
are driven below the surface
by people whose approval is conditional
so do we learn to guard our emotional lives
in a secret garden

there are treasures you keep inside you
and they are not really that hard to find
by a friend who will just listen

unfortunately,
there are just
so few people who truly care
what is in your heart

most are just interested in you
living up to their idea of who
you should be

jackson browne says this:

No one ever talks about their feelings anyway
Without dressing them in dreams and laughter
I guess it's just too painful otherwise

and this:

Everyone I've ever known has wished me well
Anyway that's how it seems, it's hard to tell
Maybe people only ask you how you're doing'
Cause that's easier than letting on how little they could care

But when you know that you've got a real friend somewhere
Suddenly all the others are so much easier to bear

I do have a real friend of this sort
who I can let into my secret garden without fear
and i know that i am truly blessed

i hope you too, oh reader
have someone that you can trust with your heart